Birth Plan no point in making one

At first it was natural no drugs just balls to the walls pushing. At our birthing class I found out that our hospital offered walking epidural this would allow me to feel no pain but still be able to sit in the shower, walk and bounce on the ball.

I guess what’s important to remember is that being pregnant means all plans need to be flexible.

After an ultrasound it was said our Xander was I believe in the 85th percentile, which made him one big baby!


Every time this was brought up I would cry. I didn’t want one for many reasons, the top most being it is major surgery. I mean have you watched any of the videos on Youtube? Plus I wouldn’t get the immediate skin on skin contact which I knew was important for baby and breastfeeding. I was going to miss the experiences of being in labor. I wanted it all the whole water breaking on the bed and waking up to smell the sheets to make sure it was my water and that I didn’t pee myself (again). The rush to the hospital only to remember that we left the bag at home; texting everyone to let them know “it’s time”! I wanted that, all of it, but nothing ever works out the way you planned it. Plus our birthing class that I paid $110 was all about natural birth so everything we were taught was about natural birth nothing about cesarean sections.

At 38 weeks we went to the Doc I was hooked up to the machine which monitors Xander’s heart and movement. After 20 min I get unhooked and Doc checks for dilation (which by the way hurts. I’m pretty sure the way it felt he was elbow deep and still pushing forward) and…nothing! After he left I cried because damn it I wanted this baby out of me and I didn’t want it via cesarean and I knew that if I didn’t dilate it wasn’t going to happen that way.

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